I hate being single...and I feel awful feeling this way ?

Your only issue that I can see is that you WANT to be dependent. Men can feel that the minute they meet you - the longing - they will run the other way and run fast. You must try to be dependent on yourself for happiness and fulfillment. The world is full of needy and stimulating causes - adults, parent-less children, abandoned animals, volunteer, go on a archaeological dig - hey, sign up with the whale wars crew - kidding, but there really are so many things you can do. Delve into a 2nd language and study abroad. You will make yourself so interesting and inspiring men and women too will all want to know you. Your life is what you make it - you are at the controls.