Is this poem Alright, what can i do to improve it?

this is actually really good. my only suggestion would be to see if you can try to get it to flow more easily - it's quite choppy, a poem with an aa bb rhyming scheme should probably read a bit more smoothly. a few alterations should do the trick, just read over it again until you get it. but for a thirteen year old, i'm really impressed by this; with a bit of work, you could be really brilliant. just keep at it, and don't give up!